Baltimore

Yesterday we spent the day in Baltimore...my old stomping grounds during college. During college I worked in Baltimore and went to school in Towson which is just a short drive from the city. It was great to be back as a tourist (happy to be visiting then heading to a much more tolerable climate in SoCal). My mom took myself, Shannon and the kids to the Baltimore aquarium. The kids LOVED it! We saw the 4D movie where we wore 3D glasses and felt the whales blow hole spray on our faces, snakes tickled our feet (air puffs and a rubber tube), and our seats vibrated and shook along with parts of the movie. It was so cool! Noah woke up this morning talking about the whale spraying him and has been talking about it non-stop all day. He also loved the sting ray exhibit and the sharks. Jordan however cried like crazy when the dolphin show was over. My mom bought her a dolphin stuffed animal and she hasn't let go of it (or stopped kissing it) since. :) Noah got a rubber sting ray that he has been carrying around with him and taking into the bath. He even told me early this afternoon that he was sticky from lunch so he needed to take a bath...with the sting ray. Funny. :)

The picture here with Shan and Jordan shows the backpack carrier they loaned us at the museum. They check strollers and loan out carriers. It is such a great system.

Travel

Killing time trying to kill each other in the airport. Silly from exhaustion.

"Plumb's dance mix is my favorite. Hmmm let me see where it is on this thing."

This photo speaks for itself.

Quick update on our travels...

We left our house last Thursday to fly to my mom's in Maryland with a "short" layover in Oakland (cheaper tickets). We ended up getting stuck in Northern California (as if that wasn't bad enough in itself - ha ha just kidding although we are from SoCal we love NorCal) for seven hours with hungry tired kids before we boarded our plane for our five our flight. Yikes. It was SUCH a long day but the kids did really well. Here's Noah before the plane even took off from Oakland and then there's Jordan. She's the bundle of energy rockin' out on my iPod even after such a long day. We met the nicest people during our wait though. We sat with a family whose son had a repaired cleft lip. He looked great and was probably the sweetest boy we've met. He shared every one of his favorite toys with Noah.

More posts to come...

Trials

Here's a cut and past from my friend's blog. Her name is Summer Martin, she's wonderfully kind, a loving thoughtful friend, she loves the Lord and is consistently growing in her walk with Him. Her blog is www.summalovinn.blogspot.com if you want to read more of her posts.

This one really struck me as I've been talking with a lot of people lately who doubt God's goodness when they're faced with trial in their lives. I always think of the song It is Well With My Soul. I hope that if I were to face a trial of great magnitude that I would respond in the like.


“Reader, if God has given you His only begotten Son, beware of doubting His kindness and love, in any painful providence of your daily life! Never allow yourself to think hard thoughts of God. Never suppose that He can give you anything which is not really for your good. Remember the words of Paul: ‘He who spared not His own Son—but delivered Him up for us all, how shall He not with Him also freely give us all things’ (Romans 8:32).

See in every sorrow and trouble of your earthly pilgrimage the hand of Him who gave Christ to die for your sins! That hand can never smite you except in love! He who gave His only begotten Son for you, will never withhold anything from you which is really for your good. Lean back on this thought and be content. Say to yourself in the darkest hour of trial, ‘This also is ordered by Him who gave Christ to die for my sins. It cannot be wrong. It is done in love. It must be well.’”

by J.C. Ryle

SHE'S WALKING!!!!!

Today is officially the day...Jordan started walking! Yay! Last week it was looking like it would be a long time before we'd see her upright. Her therapists and I were just hoping she'd walk by her 2nd birthday. She was tired today and grumpy so I was assuming it would be a wasted session but then she just took off!

She is so cute with her arms up high and her shoulders up so tight. We'll still use her walker to help her build more strength but also try to get her to walk as much as possible alone.

Check out our video. I'm so glad I had my camera in my purse!

A few pictures

Just a few pictures I've been wanting to add...it's been a long day so I'm not posting much but I will add more in a day or so.

A few of my favorite pics of the kids while at the Woodwards last weekend with her new VERY nice camera.

I love this one of our Noah. He's getting so big! Notice his gray tooth - he fell and knocked it loose last summer and it's now dead. He goes back this month for a re-check.

I love this picture and love this girl! What a nice camera huh? Jordan LOVES the water and was having a great time that day in the baby pool.

Here are a few from Father's Day with my dad. I went riding with him in the Angeles Forest. It was SO fun but quite the workout. We rode out an hour and a half or more and another hour and a half back after eating lunch. It was great hanging out with my dad being outdoors and I loved riding the horses. I rode Jeronimo and my dad rode Tioga. They were on their best behavior.

More posts tomorrow or Sunday. See you then!

Happy Fourth everyone!

Orthopaedic Update

A bit of history:
According to our perinatologist, around the 5th or 6th week of pregnancy there was most likely a "rupture" or a tear in the amniotic sac Jordan was in (typical sac supposedly and completely random with no genetic issue - our chance of this happening again are as high as anyone elses and no one knows what causes it to rupture other than injury which I didn't have). This/these tears caused sticky "bands" or strands to float around in the sac with her. Her limbs were entangled in them (and her face according to some specialists but some are still wondering if the cleft could really be caused by the bands). In wrapping around the developing limbs and digits blood supply was cut off or limited, causing constriction rings, loss of the tip of a toe, webbing of fingers and toes, extra puffy round balls of skin and it appears a band caught the end of her toes on her right foot then pulled that foot up against her shin and got tangled or wrapped around her calf. Commonly with this situation spinal tethering happens due to scar tissue but was ruled out in her case. More often, I should say, most often this situation results in death or at the very least amputation of limbs and fingers and toes. Many researchers believe that way more miscarriages are a result of this but that it's so early there is no way to really know for sure. The bands wrap around the infants body causing life threatening problems thus causing the miscarriage.
Jordan has had her fingers separated, her cleft lip and palate repaired, some scar tissue removed from her eye area, toes separated, foot released from her calf, constriction bands and extra balls of skin/fat removed and bracing/casting to stretch the tendons and slowly get that right foot in a neutral position. She still has more surgeries to build a thumb for her "good" hand (ironically although it appears to be the best one it's the least useful without a thumb that works efficiently), re-work her nose, reposition her eye, put an artificial tear duct in her eye, and any subsequent surgeries down the road particularly due to her palate issues (orthodontic work, fistula closure, jaw distraction if necessary, etc.) and cosmetic stuff to fine tune things for her face.
As you've seen on the blog we've been struggling with her leg splinting/stretching/bracing/ situation. The brace that works well is almost too strong for her while the others aren't working at all. All of them cost money our insurance company won't give without a major hassle. A friend's mom works in an orthotic and prosthetic office. He is a Christian and goes to church with this friend. He agreed to see us at no cost. He advised us to see an orthopedic specialist to try serial casting again to determine if bracing will help. This orthopaedic surgeon did an x-ray and found that Jordan has a congenital vertical talus and delayed bone growth in at least that foot (but probably all of her bones). The talus is a bone in the foot. You can look it up online if you can find a good anatomy picture. Basically this bone in her case is tilted and not connected to the navicular (another bone - obviously). Casting won't help and surgery is the only option. Everything I've researched says the surgery needs to be done by the time the child turns two. Jordan will be two in September but this surgeon thinks we need to wait for her bones to be more ossified since it appears she is delayed. He says to wait one year.
My uneducated opinion after researching this to death online is that this talus situation was caused by her foot being forced into dorsiflexion (pulled up to her shin) and is not a result of another underlying neuromuscular problem or syndrome. I believe it is an isolated problem caused by the positioning of her foot in the womb.
We're waiting for an authorization to see a specialist at UCLA named William Oppenheim. He is the head of pediatric orthopaedics at UCLA so we are hopeful that if we can see him he can, at the very least, give us sound advice. Please pray that we would know for sure that this is the surgeon God would have see her and that it would be very clear. Jordan's pediatrician (who we LOVE and can't say enough good things about) is very laid back and suggests just not worrying about the bone growth (or Jordan's short stature) and just give it all some time. I, however, am not very laid back. :) When it comes to Jordan's medical care I am very proactive and cosider it part of my job as her mom to be diligent and proactive with her care. I often wonder how crazy her doctors think I am but at the end of the day I need to know that I did my best for her. I trust in the Lord for her care but I consider it my responsibility to push for the best treatment for her. (Pray that my people pleasing self continues to persist in her medical care despite worrying about what the doctors think when I question things and push for things)
In a nutshell -
New Findings:
- Delayed bone growth (probably just a late bloomer but I'm wondering if it could be delayed only in the affected foot due to vascular compromise)
- Congenital Vertical Talus (Rocker Bottom Foot) requiring surgery (concern of mine is that they have to mess with tendons which can get tricky, I've heard)
Concerns:
- Getting a doctor approved through insurance who is not part of the current group (the ONLY group) here in Orange County as a second opinion who could ultimately treat her alongside her other surgeon at UCLA, possibly pairing the surgeries next year like we've done in the past.
- Why her bone development is delayed (he said that looking at her x-ray she has a "baby foot")
- How this will affect her walking over the next year while we wait.
- Is it painful to walk on it for longer periods of time?????
- What her gait (the way she walks) will be like and also the muscle she will be able to access in her right leg considering her calf muscle was cut in half by the band.
Here's a website that describes her foot issue and if you are interested you can Google Rocker Bottom Foot and see photos. You'll probably be surprised at how similar her foot looks to the pictures.
http://www.emedicine.com/orthoped/TOPIC478.HTM
Sorry for the lengthy post but some of you like the details and I thought I'd recap some.

Jordan's foot just before surgery at four months to separate the foot from the leg.

This one is Jordan's foot. Can you see the resemblance b/t hers and the one I found online?

Online through Google Images

Another photo found through Google.

Another Haircut

I cut Jordan's hair again (round two). I'm trying to catch the front up with the back. I figure if I keep cutting the back they'll eventually be the same length. :)

She's sitting in her new princess chair her cousin, Jayde, gave her. She doesn't really know what princesses are yet but she loves having a chair just her size.

I have some updates about Jordan's leg but I'l post it all tomorrow.

Olympic Sized Prayer...

Our dear friend, Gabe Woodward, is in a swim meet tomorrow that is a precursor to the Olympic Trials. He swam in Greece for the good ol' USofA and is trying to qualify again.
Specifically pray that he will swim his 100m freestyle in 48 seconds - tops. More than that pray that he can be a witness to others he swims with and meets. Pray that even one person will know about Christ when Gabe is done swimming this meet.

He swims at 7:00 tomorrow morning (Friday).

Go Gabe - be bold and swim fast!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Ear Surgery a Success!

Here she is on the way to the surgery center - so happy with her little Lamby thinking she's on an adventure with Mama up so early while it's still dark.

This picture is so cute. Here's where she just kept staring around at everyone but not moving an inch.

"Oh I'm so sleepy after that little nap." So sweet!

Ready to go home!

With her sticker..."I'm a great patient."

Yay! Jordan and Mama are home in time for breakfast. We left at 5:15 this morning, stopped at Starbucks and headed up to Laguna Hills for her procedure. The actual surgery itself took only 10 minutes but the prep and paperwork took over an hour. The doctor said that both ear tubes were out of place and that one of them (the ear she complains about most) was covered with wax and stuck in the ear canal. He said that same ear had quite a bit of fluid too. The better ear, the left ear, didn't have much fluid but the tube was out of that one too. He drained all the fluid, put in new tubes, antibiotic ear drops and then was done. She was so cute when I went in to get her in the recovery room. The nurses were cracking up at her. She was all wrapped up like a burrito and just dazed, trying to figure out where she was. On the way home she was fussing a bit and messing with her ears but overall she's totally fine, watching cartoons with Noah, playing with toys.

Ear Tube Surgery for Monday

For the past couple of months Jordan has been pulling on her ears, crying, and now that she's understanding and "talking" a bit more she is telling us her ears hurt. I've taken her in four times to see if she has an infection but each time the doctors say there isn't one, she's fine. They've been correct in that there is not an ear infection but what they couldn't know is that her ear tubes have come out and now she has fluid and pressure in her ears. Our pediatrician got us a quick authorization to see an Ear Nose Throat doctor (ENT) yesterday who examined her ears and did a tympanogram (a test that blows a puff of air into the ear canal then measures the amount of movement in the ear drum. That tells whether or not ear tubes are in place or working properly or if there might be fluid in the ear. The tympanogram showed that she does, indeed, need new tubes and the ENT says she's uncomfortable due to fluid build up. Poor thing. Thankfully he squeezed her in so that he could do her surgery Monday morning - yes, this Monday. It's more of a procedure than a "real" surgery as we've known surgeries to be. It's outpatient and only takes about 15 minutes. We'll get there at 5:45 a.m., the surgery will start at 6:45 and we'll be on our merry way home by 7:45 or 8:00. Our ENT (Dr. Avrum Kaufman) has a five week old at home so let's all hope that baby sleeps well the night before so that he's got a steady hand. :)

Incase any of you faithful bloggers are interested I found a great site that has an actual video of an ear tube surgery. I watched it before Jordan's first set were put in at four months. If you want to, check it out.
http://www.entusa.com/ear_tubes.htm


Here's another site that describes what the surgery does and is like.

http://kidshealth.org/parent/system/surgical/ear_infections.html

Tympanostomy Tube Surgery

If your child is old enough to understand what surgery is, you may want to prepare him or her for the visit by talking about what to expect. The following steps will be taken during ear tube surgery:

• Your child will receive general anesthesia. This means the surgery will be performed in a hospital so that an anesthesiologist can monitor your child. Typically the procedure takes about 10 to 15 minutes.
• The surgeon will make a small hole in the eardrum and remove fluid from the middle ear using suction. Because the surgeon can reach the eardrum through the ear canal, there is no visible incision or stitches.
• The surgeon will finish by inserting a small metal or plastic tube into the hole in the eardrum.

After the procedure, your child will wake up in the recovery area. In most cases, the total time spent in the hospital is a few hours. Extremely young children or those with significant medical problems may stay for a longer period.

After Surgery

A tympanostomy tube helps prevent recurring ear infections by allowing air into the middle ear. Other substances, including water, may sometimes enter the middle ear through the tube, but this is generally not a problem. Your surgeon may or may not feel that earplugs are necessary for regular bathing or swimming.

In most cases, surgery to remove a tympanostomy tube is not necessary. The tube usually falls out on its own, pushed out as the eardrum heals. A tube generally stays in the ear anywhere from 6 months to 18 months, depending on the type of tube used. If the tube remains in the eardrum beyond 2 to 3 years, however, it will likely be removed surgically to prevent a perforation in the eardrum or accumulation of debris around the tube.

Although effective in reducing chronic ear infections, ear tubes are not always a permanent cure for otitis media. Up to 25% of children who need ear tubes before the age of 2 may need them again.

I'll update on Monday. :)

Jen

Two Weeks With the Walker

Here she is just two weeks into this walker. She walks up and down the street like she owns the place! We've been having her go up and down the driveways to help with her speed and also to build her strength. She does great. She's even really starting to get the steering down. She's so funny though when it gets stuck and she can't straighten it out she gets so mad, grunts, yanks at it and persists forever. She's really a crack up - as usual. :)

Finally a short clip of the walker...

Here's a very short, lame video clip from the mall tonight. Ugg. This is challenging. You'll see in the video how unmotivated she is to walk, even at the mall. However, she is doing the most walking there so I'm going to keep it up.

After just six days with the walker she stood by herself for two seconds today at therapy. We're heading back to the mall tomorrow morning with my friend Tobi and her boys so she can help me. Hopefully that'll go better.

She rolls!

Okay so a quick post because it's so exciting. I've been faithfully praying that Jordan would like her walker and that she'd start wanting to use it. She used it some at our park yesterday which was great but she was still resistant to walking more than a few steps and it was really tough because the wheels didn't turn and if she went anywhere I'd have to be crouched next to her moving the direction then turning her around when we ran out of room etc. Today her therapist was over and suggested something another mom had done who was facing the same situation. That mom let her daughter decorate her walker and then she made it a big deal and took her to the mall to walk. There are plenty of distractions and it's wide open and really flat. Jordan's therapist also helped me unlock the front wheels so Jordan could turn it herself. Wow, what a difference. We put bows all over it (pink and brown of course) and even put a basket on it with bows for her to put "lamby" in. It was fantastic! We started at the entrance by Nordstrom (of course) and the ladies getting their hair done in the salon there were cracking up so Jordan was hamming it up for them. She was sticking her tongue out, playing coy then laughing so hard. She didn't even notice she was working. She walked about on third of the mall then when Shan and Noah went ahead she threw a fit. I was standing firm though and let her scream like crazy while everyone stared. Finally (she almost outlasted me) she stopped and I got her to finish walking to the playground. By the end she probably walked half the length of the mall or a bit more. She was stopping to rest during the last part. She would just stop, stand there and then lift one leg like it was getting tired then she'd charge ahead. Her steering isn't so great yet though. A few times when she was really distracted smiling at someone she went in a complete circle. It was hilarious. My highlight for the night was in Baby Gap. She was doing so well. She "walked" right up to the bathing suits and grabbed one. She looked at me and was yanking at the bathing suit. It was so fun to see her able to walk right up and tell me what she wanted. Normally I would say don't touch but tonight I was so thankful. It was great to see her up on her feet finally.

So if any of you are at the mall over the next few weeks look for us because it will be our second home. If she does this well at the mall I'm happy to take her every day (such a sacrifice huh?).

One other thought...I was glad Shan went with me tonight because it's still a little uncomfortable sometimes the way everyone stares. I know they can't help it and they are probably just looking because she's so cute and small with the decorated walker but it's something to get used to - being a show for everyone. I was recently talking to someone about this and was remembering when I'd take Jordan out before her lip surgery. Oh man would people stare. I totally understand that she had a hole in her face but honestly people would run their grocery carts into displays and into other shoppers because they'd be turned completely around staring. It was funny after a while but mostly it wasn't much fun. There really isn't an answer though. What are people supposed to say? I've often thought about this. We are all afraid to say "What happened to your baby?" or "What's wrong with your baby?" because it sounds negative so we just don't say anything. Most of us are intrigued or curious so we look (myself included). It's nothing judgemental or critical it's just human nature but we forget that no one likes being a show. Kids are the best - they usually just ask and then move on.

I feel like I can speak for many parents who have children with birth "defects" (this may or may not be the current PC term but I'm okay with using it) or "differences" when I say that we, as parents, are fine talking about it. Just ask if you're curious and take a peek if your interested but please don't gawk and stare because it gets uncomfortable...and correct your kids if they do it. Model respect for them and teach them that it's okay to ask and that God makes us all different with different needs, talents, gifts, etc. Also, if your children say something rude please correct them in front of the child and family they said it to. It's nice to know that you as parents find rude comments unacceptable.

One more thing then I'll stop rambling...
I was cracking up tonight at Noah. Jordan's walker is his new favorite toy. He kept trying to take it from her so he could use it at the mall. He walked back to the car in it with his head held high SO proud of "his" decorated walker. We were walking behind him laughing because he had no idea people were staring at him and we were loving that he is so used to seeing kids in walkers and wheelchairs now that it doesn't even phase him. I love that! What a gift God has given our family enabling us to be exposed to and to have a better understanding of an entire population of people. I'm excited to see how Noah does as he and Jordan grow up together.

Okay that's it for now but I'm posting pictures tomorrow of her wheels.
:)

Prayer Requests

Okay so we have a few prayer requests. I'll make it short and sweet.

1. Praise that Jordan's sensory dysfunction/integration issues seem to be getting steadily better.
2. Praise that we got her new leg brace/splint/stretcher thing adjusted and although it's not great it's better than it was.
3. Pray that something would change in our insurance or that somehow we'd be able to get her old brace back (her Dynasplint). It's $3,000 to purchase and we're out of orthopedic money as far as our insurance is concerned. There is another avenue we can check out in the next week or so.
4. Pray that she would walk soon. They say that she'll eventually walk but it's getting harder and harder to carry her everywhere as she's getting heavier and wanting to crawl around to get to what she wants. When she crawls, especially outside, she quickly wears holes and stains all of her pants. It just really feels like it's time for her to walk.
5. Pray for her summer surgery. I called her hand surgeon at UCLA last week to schedule our next appt to prepare for her next surgery and they said he is no longer w/ UCLA. I jumped through the HMO hoops to get the new guy approved for a consult and when I called him to schedule it they said he doesn't see kids. Ugg. Now I'm praying for wisdom as to another doctor to get an opinion from. Her old doc from UCLA (Jones - the one who left recently) is now at UC Irvine (closer to us) but isn't approved with insurance companies yet. Pray that he'll take our insurance.

Okay that's all for now. Thank you so much for checking in and for faithfully praying! :)

J

She's Got Wheels

At 19 1/2 months Jordan is already behind the wheel. :) I guess to be totally truthful I have to say she's behind wheels (plural). :)


We (her physical therapist, Shan and myself) are feeling like we are running out of ideas to get Jordan moving on those legs. Her foot is down enough that she is stable "enough" and when she has her tennis shoes on with her inserts in her shoes she should be very stable. We've dealt with a lot of her sensory issues (feeling unstable when not secure physically). We've worked on strengthening her legs and are working on her core muscles. We've started with some cool strappy things to support her while she's upright, then we moved to parallel bars on to a small bar in front while she walks but the desire and the security just doesn't really seem to be there.


Today her physical therapist gave us (loaned us) a walker (praise God because we are out of orthopedic money with our insurance).



The Woodwards stopped in for a surprise visit today and Hudson Man tried showing Jordan that it's no big deal to walk in this thing. Isn't he so cute????!!!

She liked it okay at therapy but as you can tell from the picture she hated it once we got home. We tried having Noah walk in it and even Jordan's little friend, Hudson used it but she couldn't care less. She can totally walk in it without problem and it can be a wonderful tool for all of us. I would have to carry her less, she could potentially walk in this thing everywhere possible and it seems that would make her walk alone that much quicker. The problem is that she doesn't seem to like it.

I'll keep you posted as to her progress.

Jen

A Mother Is a Chalice

Happy Mother's Day to all who are reading this. Shannon woke me up early this morning with my favorite - Starbuck's, of course. :) The kids were still sleeping so we sipped our coffee and read before getting up. I intentionally chose The Shaping of a Christian Family by Elisabeth Elliot. I don't have much time for reading (outside my Bible study time) so when I have a few minutes I really cherish it and look forward to it, carefully deciding what I'll read. I love books and love reading so to have a few minutes here and there to read a chapter out of a great book is SUCH a treat.

In this book I read the chapter titled A Mother Is a Chalice. Here are a couple paragraphs that struck me.

"A mother is a chalice, the vessel without which no human being has ever been born. She is created to be a life-bearer, cooperating with her husband and with God in the making of a child. What solemn responsibility. What an unspeakable privilege - a vessel divinely prepared for the Master's use."

Another paragraph that had much meaning is this one:

"There has been no preparation that seems nearly adequate for this cataclysmic upheaval of their lives. A boy and a girl became a husband and a wife, and suddenly they are a father and a mother, overnight as it were, without anything to ready them for the awesome task of fashioning the destiny of a soul. The awareness of inadequacy frightens the life out of many."

This paragraph reminds me of something that you may chuckle at. Hours and days (really weeks and months) after having Noah I was struck by the fact that the hospital was going to let us take him home. I just couldn't believe that they would let me, of all people, leave that hospital with such a dependent, delicate little thing. I couldn't even keep track of my car keys on a regular basis, how was I supposed to care for this baby. It really just blew me away. In fact, I can remember clear as if it were yesterday, the day we where scheduled to leave the hospital I was out of the room and upon my return a nurse said that the social worker had stopped by to see me. A little bit later I was out again, for some reason, and missed the social worker once again. I remember thinking that they had found me out. Someone had realized it would be catastrophic to allow me to take home an infant so they had contacted the social worker to come by and check on me. :) Praise God that, in His infinite wisdom and mercy, these children are really His, under His care and He will provide the wisdom and the training we need if only we ask.

I also remember, during those early days, being more tired than I can explain in words. It was the first time I physically felt I was at the end of myself with so little sleep and such physical exhaustion. There have been many more times similar since then and also times with such heaps of stress poured on top of that same exhaustion but each time God has pulled me through. This makes me think of a sermon I listened to yesterday by John MacArthur (you can download or listen online to sermons by him at Grace to You and our own pastor Mike Fabarez has the same set up through Focal Point Radio Ministries online). It was on the Proverbs woman in honor of Mother's Day. He said in one part that being a mother is a sacrifice but also a gift. That we should never look at our motherly duties as our cross to bear, or have the attitude of bearing up under the pressure, or just gritting our teeth and doing our job. We are to have TRUE joy in this service. We are have this be the joy of our heart (after our relationship with Christ of course). It is SUCH a gift and we should look at it this way. What a perspective shift from our society today.

So in all of this I had to post how thankful I am and how I am still in awe of the fact that God chose me to mother these children. Me! I can't help but think he must have dozed off when it happened, allowing this to slip past. Obviously nothing slips past our mighty Creator so I trust that He will continue to provide women older and wiser than I to guide me, scripture to teach me, a heart for prayer in this, and the grace to overlook my failures and shortcomings.

Happy Mother's Day to you all!

Life Without Limbs

Here's a video of Nick Vujicic. It's amazing. He so clearly lays out the reason for us to have joy in the midst of suffering and trials. I think this is the video clip where he's on Robert Schuller's show - I'm in no way endorsing Schuller but this clip is really a good one.
Please comment if you can.
Jen

The Wise Woman

I found this today through a link on our pastor's Facebook page. I loved it and thought it was such a good explanation of this verse and a great reminder.

Proverbs 14:1 - The wise woman builds her house
NIV: The wise woman builds her house,but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down.
KJV: Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands.
NASB: The wise woman builds her house,But the foolish tears it down with her own hands.
Proverbs 14:1

Commentary
A wise woman builds. The fact that this woman is called "wise" indicates that she fears and reverences the Lord. She conscientiously builds her house, making her entire household thrive, because she has learned that wisdom brings the happiness and prosperity she desires for her family. The wise woman cares for her home, causing it to flourish and become a haven to those who live there. She builds her home by making wise choices in her relationships with her husband and children. She works on her marriage, knowing that intimacy does not happen naturally but must be developed. All building takes time, picturing brick set on brick until a sturdy safe home is constructed. In contrast, the foolish woman does not build. She tears down both her possessions and her relationships. She destroys by her own efforts-with her hands, her tongue, her idleness, and her lack of interest.

Thomas Nelson, I. (1997, c1995). Woman's study Bible . (Pr 14:1). Nashville: Thomas Nelson.

Discipline(s)

dis·ci·pline [dis-uh-plin] –noun
1. training to act in accordance with rules; drill: military discipline.
2. activity, exercise, or a regimen that develops or improves a skill; training
3. punishment inflicted by way of correction and training.
4. the rigor or training effect of experience, adversity, etc.
5. behavior in accord with rules of conduct; behavior and order maintained by training and control
6. a set or system of rules and regulations.
7. Ecclesiastical. the system of government regulating the practice of a church as distinguished from its doctrine.
8. an instrument of punishment, esp. a whip or scourge, used in the practice of self-mortification or as an instrument of chastisement in certain religious communities.
9. a branch of instruction or learning: the disciplines of history and economics. –verb (used with object)
10. to train by instruction and exercise; drill.
11. to bring to a state of order and obedience by training and control.
12. to punish or penalize in order to train and control; correct; chastise.
(taken from Dictionary.com)

Hebrews 12:11-13
"No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it. Therefore, strengthen your feeble arms and weak knees. "Make level paths for your feet," so that the lame may not be disabled, but rather healed."

I've been thinking a bit lately about the term discipline. I think of it often through the day as I am working dligently to train the hearts of my children. Often this is the form of the word which means to "punish, penalize in order to train and control; correct; castise" as stated in #12 above from Dictionary.com. However, during my talks with Noah I explain Hebrews 12 and the fact that discipline, both the #12 meaning AND #2 above as in "activity, exercise, or a regimen that develops or improves a skill; training," are typically not enjoyable or pleasant but they produce a harvest of righteousness and peace. The two sides of this come up so often in life it's so great that God's word addresses it so clearly. In Hebrews 12 the topic of enduring chastening is one sign of being a child of God. God chastens those He loves but in the same chapter the race metaphor is also used, as in disciplining ourselves for the purpose of training. This one (training)is more of the meaning I'm talking about in this post.

My John MacArthur commentary discusses vs 12,13 in this way:
"The author returnes to the race metaphor begun in vv. 1-3 (cf. Prov 4:25-27) and incorporates language taken from Isaiah 35:3 to describe the disiplined individual's condition like a weary runner whose arms drop and knees wobble. When experiencing trials in his life, the believer must not allow the circumstances to get the best of him. Instead, he must endure and get his second wind so as to be renewed to continue the race." (Commentary Bible p. 1920)

When I was studying my Bible the morning of a big bike ride (another insane fundraising activity I did) I came across these verses in Hebrews and I wrote them on a note card to tape to my bike handles. Those verses became so engrained in my mind by the end of those 5 days peddling my way from Big Bear to Mamoth (yes from the parking lot at Big Bear, down the mountain, along the dreaded 395 to the top of Mammoth at the main lodge) that I had a better understanding of disciplining myself as in the #2 and #4 meanings above.
As I was training for my marathon (another fundraising event I've mentioned on here before) I again focused on Hebrews 12. I wrote it on the back of my jersey the day of the event as a reminder to those behind me (not many people were back there mind you - ha ha).

During trials in my life (too many to list) including times of chastening by the Lord I've often referred again to Hebrews 12. I've been reminded of the fact that God's word is living and active (1 Peter 2) and that although it is constant and always the same its meaning can apply to SO many different areas of our lives at so many different times. Don't confuse what I'm saying here - there is only one true meaning of scripture which can be found through careful study of historical and cultural context, along with a few other specific methods of exegeting scripture. Another post for another time - after reading up on it so I don't lead any astray in my ignorance.

I am posting this because Hebrews 12 is once again popping up in my life. I've been dying to get a double jogger I can use to run (my favorite form of exercise) but we're cutting back on extras until the mortgage business picks up again. I began to pray for a very cheap jogger that I could afford using leftover Christmas money and money from the sale of my current jogger. A fellow mom at Jordan's therapy unit came in one day saying she wanted to sell her $700 jogger for $175 to me. That is the exact price I could afford. Of course I took her up on it and I've felt like a free woman ever since. I can now get out of the house to exercise while working around Jordan's therapy schedule. I've once again disciplined myself to run almost daily and am now already up to 4.6 miles. In addition, this physical discipline has affected every other area of my life. My Bible study time is more consistent, my prayer time is getting much better, my training of my children, my denying of myself in my eating habits (as well as sinful habits), the list goes on. All this to say how great it is that if we can just take one area of our lives and work at becoming disciplined the same process of training ourselves will apply to all others. Definition #12 "to bring to a state of order and obedience by training and control" will naturally spill over into our lives as a whole.

We can all do what I've done for a long time in regard to many areas of my life...sit around and talk about it. However, I've found it to be much more effective when we actually get up and do something. We can talk about all the things we want to do or should be doing and never, ever do them. If I can impart anything in this post it's for all of us to simply get up and do something...commit to reading God's word daily, praying throughout your day, begin working on memory verses with your children or yourself, add one small healthy habit to your life (walk with your family three times a week) -whatever it is stop talking and do it (I, of course, recommend starting the habit of reading your Bible daily and praying before beginning any of the other ones listed). :)

Jordan's First Haircut and More

Jordan has had a mullet for a while now. Another way I've heard her hair described (lovingly by a friend as we were laughing) was business in the front and party in the back. Her hair has been getting so long in the back but not growing in the front so we decided to trim the back. I did it myself so it's probably not great but it works and is so cute. We just keep staring at her realizing how big she looks and how old she's getting. Sadly, we're seeing the baby grow up.

I also posted a few pictures from today after church. We were playing outside and laughing because Noah wanted to ride in Jordan's baby walker and Jordan was content riding on his tricycle. Typical of both of them. Again we were struck by how big she looks on his bike. The last picture is of Jordan mesmerized by a ladybug. So cute!

More posts to come!

Jen

Memory Lane

For those of you I haven't talked to yet, my grandpa died last Wednesday. I will post details on another post soon but I wanted to post these pictures from the weekend. We went to Palmdale for the viewing and funeral and couldn't help but walk around the property to take a trip down memory lane. It was great to remember all the good times out there but sad at the same time and then also strange to see Noah out there exploring and playing like I used to, and my dad used to.
Anyway, enjoy the pictures and watch for a post about my grandpa in the next couple of days.
















Here's my grandpa's barn. As kids we spent countless hours exploring and playing back here, imagining my grandparents, dad, aunts and uncles out here as kids. From anyone else's perspective it's full of dusty relics but to our family it's overflowing with memories.



















Here's the old swing set my dad and his brother and sisters would play on when they were kids. As a child myself I would play for hours out here on this thing. It was rusted when I was young so you can imagine it now. In fact I was reminiscing with my dad about the time my stepsister, Tara, and I were out here listening to Pet Shop Boys on our "ghettoblaster" for hours. It was surreal, to say the least, watching my son play on the swing set while my dad and I looked on. Time flies!!!

















Here sits the old Model A that has been out back (in the same spot) since we were kids. I can't remember sitting in it because it was so dusty so you can imagine the condition it's in 25 years later.















Tractor parts out there, still in the same place I remember them.

















I'm not sure if any of you have special memories of certain Christmas presents but I sure do. This is one of them. If any of you have ever seen the classic movie, I think it's called The Christmas Story, where the boy is dying for a BB gun then you'll understand. This doll house was on my list and I can remember as if it were yesterday opening it up. It was the most beautiful thing ever! Imagine my surprise when I found it, furniture still carefully placed the way I left it, 25 or so years later. I took the furniture out to save for Jordan but I think the house itself has seen its last day. So sad.

Just some funny pics from our concert time today after naps...so fun!

Update on Jordan's Therapy Progress

I have so many things I'd like to blog about personally but I figure many of you are checking in here to hear about Jordan, not my latest musings.
Two weeks ago I was getting discouraged once again. I tend to go up and down with discouragement as we work so hard with her and see no progress. God inevitably gives us a milestone or two to keep us going (every good and perfect gift comes from God).
Speech:
Jordan was not babbling, not using jargon (intonation of speech with no real words), not attempting words - only signing (more than one year delayed). Suddenly on Easter she started saying Papa (all the grand kids love their Papa so of course this is what she started saying). Then on Monday she just took off. She began babbling all kinds of consonants, and actually trying to say words. I was ecstatic. Her speech therapist told me later that she cried on her way home from work that day. Truly these milestones are so touching when you watch kids struggle for such a long time to meet them. I remember watching a 3 year old take her first steps without her walker last summer. I had seen her doing the hard work week after week in therapy and when she took those steps there wasn't a dry eye in the house.
Physical and Occupational Therapy:
We've had some problems with Jordan's leg brace she wears at night to stretch her foot down so she'll be able to walk later. Basically insurance hassles, financial burdens and appointments all over the place to figure out what will be the best choice for her. We are sending back the brace she has now at the end of the month and are starting with a new one. We aren't sure this one will work as well but it's a fraction of the cost so we're giving it a shot. We should have it next week to try and they said she can wear it more hours through the day so hopefully it'll be aggressive in it's stretch. If not, then we'll work to get the current brace back.
Development:
Her developmental specialist we see once a week has also been really excited about Jordan's progress. She is really pleased by her attention span and her skills that just keep getting better and better. We love Kathleen and are so happy to have her come to our house each week.

We are truly blessed beyond measure for Jordan's specialists. They love her and she is smitten by all of them. She works hard and they are commited to her success. Each and every person Jordan works with on a regular basis (including our pediatrician) really go above and beyond to help her.

Kathleen and Jordan


That same week she made such strides in Speech she started cruising along furniture. We were amazed. She just took off. I had the usual bribes waiting for her at the end of the table in therapy and she just headed down to me, took the treat, turned around, went back the other way then looked at me as if to say, "Well, aren't you going to come over here and give me my reward??" We were laughing so hard. Since then she's seen a higher level PT who gave us some great suggestions and now she is even walking along parallel bars and holding with only one hand. We have a bet going - I say 5 weeks until she's walking and Brian (her therapist) says 3-4.



One funny thing I laugh at is how much Jordan makes her therapists laugh. Her PT and OT call it the Jordan Party when we're there. She's so hilarious.

Quick Update on Great Grandpa

For those of you who were or are praying for my grandpa (my dad's dad) I wanted to update on what God has been doing in his life.

As a recap - he was gardening in the warm winter sun, driving his mower, and tinkering in his garage one day then in having his second triple bypass the next. He went in for a check of his heart because of chest pain and they needed to do another bypass. He hasn't been home since and that was mid-December. He had minor breathing trouble so they put him on a breathing tube and sedated him (buckets of Morphine) so he ended up on the breathing machine sedated for a number of weeks, maybe over a month. His 86 year old body grew weaker so when the family finally insisted the Morphine be reduced he was somewhat dependent on the breathing machine. They did a tracheostomy and continued to sedate him. In the process his heart has had some ups and downs and one week he decided to cease all measures. We went to see him, to say goodbye and my dad insisted they recheck all heart and breathing stats before making such a final decision. Ends up they hadn't checked his heart for months. Uggg. Upon hearing his heart was okay and the breathing issues were mental he was then ready to fight again. Within a week he was off the trach and breathing machine (with the help of a little Atavan (spelling?) - that stuff is great, Jordan was on it in the hospital too. He's since been moved to nursing/rehab facility and is doing oral motor exercises hoping to be off the feeding tube eating a hamburger and drinking an ice cold Coke soon. :)

Everyone is wondering if his muscles can regain enough strength for him to go home and if he'll be able to swallow enough to enjoy a Double Double but if it keeps going the way it has for him it shouldn't be a problem.

Personally I love going to see him. :) I love having time with him just to talk and encourage him and help him with his exercises. It's a long drive to Sylmar but well worth it. It's become a Sunday event now and this past weekend I took Shan and the kids with me. It was great and I would guess so good for him to have the kids there. Noah said that all Great Grandpa needed was a Band-Aid and he would be all better. Jordan just loved bouncing on the bed and pulling at the tape on his hand.

We really have so much to learn from older generations. As the younger ones we tend to think we know so much and that older family members couldn't possibly have anything to teach us that 's relevant or noteworthy. That couldn't be farther from the truth. My Grandpa still says that he doesn't think much about what happens after death so I'm praying that he will recognize God as his creator and Christ as his savior before his day comes to leave this world.

Pray for this please.

Here are a few pictures of my first official baby sling. I'm making one right now for a friend but I'm waiting for the metal rings to come in the mail. In the meantime I decided to whip up a sling for anothe friend's daughter. Tonight I gave little Reese Woodward her first baby sling to carry her baby doll in just like mommy. It was fitting considering the fact that Reese's mommy, Staci, gave me my sling. I will post a picture of all three of us with our babies in our slings. I made this one to fit Reese (a three year old) so it didn't take much material and I was able to find the smaller rings at Lowe's. It worked well as a trial.

Alison - yours is coming soon. I wonder if I should start taking orders...hmmm.

Before you jump in line you may want to look closely to see the lame stitching. :)

jen